I really fucked it up this time, didn't I my dear?

Why do I care so much about you, after all you've done to me? I mean, you're nothing really special, just another stupid teenage idiot.

But you were always my idiot, and that's what counts. God, I used to believe in you. I really did. But I don't know what to believe anymore. You blew it, idiot.I hope you're happy. Just when I thought everything would be okay, you threw it all away. You changed before my eyes and it's like these last months meant nothing. I'm not gonna lie, this hurts like hell. I've never hurt this much over another person.

I want to be done with you. But I can't say goodbye. This might seem backwards, but I don't know what hurts more right now,
the possibility that you never cared about me at all, or the possibility that you still do.


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